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Sounds like you are keeping calm with the BMW people. That's good. And pretty hard to do under the circumstances.
I would imagine that the trim should be able to be replaced without causing damage. And if you have an order confirmation that states you ordered the aluminum trim, then I would expect the dealership to bear the cost.
Next question is could you live with the wood trim? Is is a big deal for you? If it's a show stopper, then that is one thing. If it's not, maybe it's time to negotiate a compromise. If the dealer is faced with a cost of trim replacement, maybe you could reduce the cost for him BUT get him to throw in something that (to you) is more important than the trim. Just a thought.
I hope you did not take delivery of the car if you plan to push the issue in whatever direction. Makes it harder to negotiate.
If you have, and things get tough, your next steps are to BMW USA.
Good luck.
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