BMW 1 Series Coupe Forum / 1 Series Convertible Forum (1M / tii / 135i / 128i / Coupe / Cabrio / Hatchback) (BMW E82 E88 128i 130i 135i)
 





 

Post Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
      10-13-2022, 11:10 AM   #1
3.0L
Colonel
3.0L's Avatar
8938
Rep
2,010
Posts

Drives: M235i, 20k miles
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: California

iTrader: (0)

How many *** does it take to change a light bulb

How many cockroaches does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Can’t tell. They scatter as soon as the light turns on.
__________________
///M235i | Mineral Grey Metallic | Premium Package | Technology Package | Driver Assistance Package | Dakota Coral Red/Black Leather | Harman/Kardon Premium 360 watt sound system | 8-speed automatic

When writing your life's plan, use a pencil with an eraser
Appreciate 0
      10-13-2022, 11:16 AM   #2
G MONEY
Major
1240
Rep
1,446
Posts

Drives: 2017 458/ YAS m4
Join Date: Jan 2022
Location: EARTH

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by 3.0L View Post
How many cockroaches does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Can’t tell. They scatter as soon as the light turns on.
You should be banned for life🤣😂
Appreciate 0
      10-13-2022, 11:41 AM   #3
wtwo3
Major General
wtwo3's Avatar
17971
Rep
5,484
Posts

Drives: 23 X7 40i; 23 M3; 24 cooper s
Join Date: Aug 2019
Location: IL

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
I can see why you didn't put this in the LOL or jokes thread.
__________________
2023 BMW X7 xDrive40i
2023 BMW M3 6MT
2024 Mini Cooper S Convertible

'20 BMW m340i... '20 BMW X5 40i... '16 Infiniti Q50 RS 400... '10 Lexus RX 350... '08 Lexus IS 350... '00 Nissan Maxima... '93 Nissan Maxima
Appreciate 1
Esteban43811.00
      10-13-2022, 12:48 PM   #4
vreihen16
Recovering Perfectionist
vreihen16's Avatar
United_States
15333
Rep
941
Posts

Drives: 2015 BMW i3 BEV
Join Date: Jun 2019
Location: Orange County, NY

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
Q: How many Microsoft programmers does it take to change a light bulb?


A1: None. That's a hardware problem.

A2: None. They just re-define darkness as the new standard.
__________________
2015 BMW i3 BEV, Giga World (Lodge interior), Tech/Driving Assist Packages, 30K miles
Appreciate 1
      10-13-2022, 12:58 PM   #5
ezaircon4jc
Major General
ezaircon4jc's Avatar
United_States
4485
Rep
5,367
Posts

Drives: 2019 540i M Sport
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: San Diego

iTrader: (0)

We used to have a joke on how long it took AF (Airways Facilities, AKA maintenance) to change a light bulb.

We had spotlights over the radar scopes so we could see the flight progress strips and write the appropriate info on them. One burned out one day and AF was called to replace it. The guy shows up with a DVOM to check for power I guess (it's a burned out bulb, for cryin' out loud!). After his 10 minute check, he disappears for about a half hour and returns with an LED bulb instead of the yellowish, incandescent bulbs we normally have. I asked if I could have one of those bulbs as the light was much cleaner. He got rather miffed, took out the bulb and started to storm off when a coworker spouted-off (we are a smart-Aleky bunch) that we've now answered the age old question of how long it takes AF to change a light bulb! It was about another hour before he returned with a new bulb.
Appreciate 0
      10-13-2022, 04:25 PM   #6
DDD31
Captain
DDD31's Avatar
1649
Rep
891
Posts

Drives: 24 M3CS, 95 E320, 85 300CD
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Michigan

iTrader: (0)

Name:  DD268EA8-C86D-472D-84AC-418EE5467CCC.jpeg
Views: 264
Size:  86.5 KB
.
__________________

2021 MBB M5C (retired) 2018 Daytona Violet M3 ZCP (retired), 2016 AW 550i (retired)
2013 EBII 335i (retired), 2008 Platinum Bronze 535xi (retired), 2007 Monaco Blue 335i (retired)
1999 Hellrot M3 coupe (retired)
Appreciate 3
vreihen1615333.00
kscarrol8912.00
wtwo317971.00
      10-13-2022, 04:30 PM   #7
vreihen16
Recovering Perfectionist
vreihen16's Avatar
United_States
15333
Rep
941
Posts

Drives: 2015 BMW i3 BEV
Join Date: Jun 2019
Location: Orange County, NY

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
Q: How many therapists does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Only one, but it must want to change first.
__________________
2015 BMW i3 BEV, Giga World (Lodge interior), Tech/Driving Assist Packages, 30K miles
Appreciate 1
Esteban43811.00
      10-13-2022, 07:09 PM   #8
rwheels
Major
7067
Rep
1,021
Posts

Drives: E93 M3
Join Date: May 2020
Location: California

iTrader: (0)

How many bureaucrats does it take to change a light bulb?

To begin with, it takes one to issue the requisition form LB24, one to sign the work order DF69, three to consult with management and reject both forms as not applicable to maintenance as per regulations. Seventeen to form a fact finding committee to discuss the overuse of LB24,after ten months of debate, there will be an inquiry into the findings of this committee, and twenty-one members will discuss the ramifications of the darkened rooms, after a further year the undersecretary of public works will call a press conference to announce increased budget spending to increase efficiency of the department…
Appreciate 2
Post Reply

Bookmarks


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 06:40 PM.




1addicts
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions Inc.
1Addicts.com, BIMMERPOST.com, E90Post.com, F30Post.com, M3Post.com, ZPost.com, 5Post.com, 6Post.com, 7Post.com, XBimmers.com logo and trademark are properties of BIMMERPOST